A very fond memory of mine as a young woman was going to the second-hand clothing markets in Accra. The sellers had their methods of persuading one to buy their wares. One trick was showcasing certain clothing items as particularly sought after. These were items, they claimed, everyone had been asking for. They would take time to tell you about so so and so who had come by and promised to definitely pick them up the next couple of days.
The idea was simple: make a piece of clothing appear desired by others, and you might make it more desirable to the person before you.
This method reveals a very core human nature. Sometimes, our desire for something has less to do with the thing itself and more to do with the fact that others have it or want it.
This method is not only used in those second hand markets in Accra. We want what is popular, admire what others admire, and often measure the value of what we have against what others own. Without realising it, our desires are primarily shaped by the preferences of others.
The issue is, there will always be something someone else has that we do not. There will always be another trend to follow, another achievement to pursue, and another standard against which to measure ourselves.
If we are not careful, we might spend our lives chasing trends and things we never really needed.
Perhaps this is why contentment requires a level of self-awareness. Being able to distinguish between what we genuinely desire and be appreciative of what we have.
I think being content means being actually inspired by what others have but having a deep sense of self awareness to know you will not chase it to fit the crowd but for yourself.
Perhaps real freedom lies in knowing ourselves, our needs and desires and being appreciating of what we have.
