Nana Kesewaa, Author at Confessions of a Ghanaian Girl

Something but not everything

Sometimes, the hardest thing to thank God for is what you survived.

Someone deceived you.
Something was taken from you.
And for a while, you may grieve not only the loss, but the person you were before it happened.

So when people say, “Just move on,”
you smile, because they make moving on sound so simple.

It isn’t.

But then you look at your life.

And you realise,
they took something, but they did not take everything.

God kept you.

And sometimes, that is enough reason to whisper:

Thank You, Lord.

Take the lesson.
Leave the weight.
Carry the wisdom.

And when your heart is ready,
move on.

To be Jollof or not to be Jollof.

What happens when a recipe is altered?

Imagine inviting three friends over for dinner. When they arrive you inform them you will be preparing Ghana Jollof for dinner. All three show excitement at your chosen meal. Especially as they have never eaten it but heard a lot about it. So you start off by explaining and showing them the typical Jollof ingredients. However, as soon as you start, one guest starts to argue about how fresh tomatoes should not be added in a rice meal. They ask very politely if it’s possible to omit it from the meal. Though you explain that Jollof needs the tomatoes to be Jollof, they do not appreciate your opinion. And so you give in to their request and omit the tomatoes to please your guest. Later another guest starts a conversation about how garlic and ginger are rather toxic when cooked. They claim research shows garlic and ginger are never meant to be cooked or added in meals but only eaten raw. The other guests agree with them, so you take the ginger and the garlic too out.
Soon, the stew is ready and it’s time to add the rice. You wash the rice and proceed to add it when the third guest screams!
“No, what are you doing??”
You explain you are adding the rice to the stew as typical of Jollof.
They claim rice should never be cooked in that manner.
But then you ask what they thought Jollof was?
They explain they never knew rice was cooked in the stew and they think that it’s disgusting to cook rice that way.
So you listen to them too and set the rice aside and cook it separately.
In the end, what is served, though your guests seem to delight in it, is not Jollof. It is a rice dish for sure, eaten to satisfy hunger, but definitely not Jollof.

I once had a conversation with an acquaintance about Christianity. In their opinion, there were certain aspects of the nature of God and Christian beliefs they could never accept like the concept of hell.
Later as I reflected over that conversation, I thought if Christianity has core principles and you decide to choose and pick what fits your personal feelings and beliefs then in the end, what you practice is not Christianity but a modified version or maybe a different religion. I was reminded that it’s the same as when you set out to prepare a meal according to a recipe. If you take certain key elements of the recipe out or modify it so that the core technique of the meal is not executed then the meal that turns out in the end is not what was defined in the recipe. It is your own version of that meal.

A Trap for two

Have you ever faced a test that felt like a matter of life and death? I think of those American movies where a man is tied up by a crime gang and forced to confess.

Jesus was once in a similar situation. He was confronted with the case of a woman caught in adultery—a setup aimed not only at her but at Him. She may have been targeted intentionally, but Jesus was the true focus of their trap.

In that moment, it wasn’t only the woman whose life was at risk; Jesus’ life was on the line too. Yet He responded with such wisdom that the accusers dropped their stones, sparing both her and Himself.

I used to see this story only from the woman’s perspective—how Jesus saved her and gave her freedom. Now I realize it is also about Jesus: His wisdom, His mercy, and His refusal to condone killing as instant justice.

And this changes how I read every story where Jesus frees someone—whether from sin, sickness, or demonic oppression. Each story is not just about the person being helped; it is also a revelation of who Jesus is.

The same is true for us. Our encounters with Jesus are about us, but they also reveal Him. My life shows what Jesus Christ is capable of. My story is the story of Jesus too.

Divine Scorekeeper: The false image of God

For the past month in church, we’ve been studying the image of God, and it has been a profound reminder of how skewed my own image of Him used to be.

Growing up, I learned about God primarily through the adults around me and through lessons in children’s ministry. It wasn’t until I took the time to read the entire Bible on my own and learn directly from the Holy Spirit that my perception fundamentally changed.

The Lie I Believed

My childhood impression of God was a lie. I mistakenly believed He was a God whose sole delight was in punishing human beings. I thought He was a divine scorekeeper who wrote a strict set of rules, checking them off, and punishing us immediately when we failed.

I thought He only loved me when I was doing His will—a will that felt impossible to accomplish. The enemy’s lie was simple: God delights in drowning us in standards and commandments He knows we will never achieve. This false image kept me from pursuing a genuine, true relationship with Him.

The Personal Impact

This skewed view of God greatly affected my image of myself.

If I think my Creator doesn’t love me and just looks for opportunities to punish me, how can I see myself as a King’s daughter? How can I see myself as a loved and cherished daughter if all I see is a God who hovers over me and sets unachievable standards? My image of my Creator, Father, and King has everything to do with the way I see myself.

The Truth I Found

Perhaps you also struggle with some wrong impressions of God—afraid to let Him in, thinking He will ruin your life or keep you from the “good” things of life. These are all lies.

I can testify: God desperately loves us and is merciful. Unlike the rigid, fear-based picture taught in an old children’s song (“if you sin, he will see it and write it and not bless you”), I have seen God in countless expressions. My lifetime will not permit me to know Him in all His expressions.

But if there is one image I can leave with you, it is this: God desperately loves and is merciful.

I Just Learned About ‘Alienation of Affection’

This week I learned something new—”alienation of affection.”

“Alienation of affection” is a common law tort (a civil wrong) that allows a spouse to sue a third party for intentionally interfering with their marriage, which resulted in the loss or destruction of love, affection, and companionship from their spouse.

In the interesting North Carolina court case Montague v. Kennard, which ended this week, the jury reached a verdict that Kennard was ordered to pay $1.75 million in damages to Montague for “alienation of affection” and “criminal conversation.” In simple words, Kennard was found to have intentionally “stolen” Montague’s husband, and now has to pay the price.

My first thought when I came across this news item was: such a thing exists? Is it possible to go to court for such a thing?

Apparently, these torts are labeled as “outdated” and may be repealed in the near future. But this particular case has lived rent-free in my mind.

I have been thinking: was this worth it? For an earthly love? For a love that is not eternal? I do not mean to trivialize any love relationship, and I might not “get” some things. But why go to such lengths for someone who is not yours at any price?

This case has me reflect on earthly justice and God’s justice. It hit me: $1.75 million is not a few cents; it’s a tremendous amount. That is only earthly justice, but what would God’s justice look like if we truly left vengeance to Him? Does it pinch like $1.75 million?,

Letting principles thrive

I’ve been reflecting on the prodigal son and what made him take his inheritance, leave home, and waste it on reckless living. Would he have lived the same way if he had stayed home? Why did he have to go far to lose his principles? Coming from a strict Jewish home, perhaps he sought freedom, but if his values were strong, distance would not have changed him. Living far from Ghana, I see a similar challenge in myself. If I truly built good character, it should show wherever I am. Valuing the discipline I was raised with means that reckless living should feel wrong. The prodigal son reminds me that core values do not change with location; they are tested by it and should thrive in any place.

Does God have favourites?

Does God have favourites? Is the answer Yes? No? Maybe? Who cares? There have been times in my life when I felt God had “His people”. Especially when a testimony is shared of God answering for others the very prayer that has been left unanswered for a while. In those moments, it can feel like God favours some above others.

In the Bible, when we learn how God called some like Abraham, Abel, Moses, and David out of others, it’s easy to conclude that God has favorites. However, growing in my knowledge of God’s nature has taught me this: While God chooses certain people for specific purposes, His arms are open to all, and He is good to all. The good news is that His love is not limited to some of His creation. Nor are His blessings for a certain group of people. Everyone can be God’s favourite. God actually wants us all to be His favourites.

Let’s talk about Hagar, who was mistreated by Abraham and Sarah, “God’s people”. God saw her, heard her cry, and came to her rescue when she needed help. Think about the daughters of Zelophehad, who God made an exception for them and ensured they received their portion because they asked. Think of Nebuchadnezzar, a pagan king, who God humbled and restored before receiving his worship.

Throughout the Bible, we see outsiders, foreigners, and outcasts who sought God or cried out to Him and received mercy and blessing. Ruth, a Moabite, and Rahab, a Canaanite—both foreign women—became part of the lineage of Jesus Christ. The people of Nineveh, though not part of God’s own, had their repentance accepted by God. The Canaanite woman whose faith made Jesus heal her daughter, and Cornelius the Roman centurion, who God chose to host Peter and cause a major shift in Christianity.

God is good and His heart is beyond our understanding. He shines His goodness on the righteous and even on the wicked. So if the only reason to count yourself as not one of “His favorites” is because of unanswered prayers, remember God does not practice favouritism. God loves all His children and welcomes all who call on Him. And He responds to all prayers, though not always as we expect. Even if doubts whisper that we don’t belong or we aren’t favoured, we must remember — God loves everyone. He loves the world so deeply that He will not withhold any good thing, especially from those who have chosen Him through His Son.

The Noise Beyond Silence

Life gives us the opportunity to build elaborate facades of our lives, edit the narrative, and carefully curate the persona we want others to see. We can address bad PR or gossip and manage our reputation. We also line up many secrets with the hope to take them with us to the other side. However, the grave is not a vault. It’s a spotlight. Death dissolves every pretence. It lays bare the absolute truth of one’s deeds while alive.

In the silence, the whispers start. The hidden acts of kindness or cruelty, the true nature of character all get poured out into the light. Who one claimed to be is forgotten, who one was becomes public legacy. No chance to defend oneself. The only verdict that matters is the one written by the life actually lived.

The world is flawed. Stop being shocked when it fails you.

We do ourselves a great disservice by placing our hope and trust in anything on this earth. No person, no human institution, nothing on earth is perfect. Only God is truly holy and perfect. It is time we stopped placing our ultimate faith in human titles and realize that only God deserves your absolute trust.

All of my help

Life presents those moments where the easiest thing to do is to run and hide in a “mountain,” which could be a person, a new city, or a job, until it’s safe to emerge. David knew these moments too well. When his friends urged him in Psalm 11:1 to, “Flee like a bird to your mountain,” David’s response was: “In the Lord I take refuge.” David chose not to hide in a mountain for safety, but to find his help in the Lord. He knew that the greatest security will never come from the mountains, but from the God who made them.

Psalm 121:1-2 reminds us that while the hills may be the first thing we look to for help, our focus must be lifted beyond them to the Lord

“I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth.”

The hills represent the places we run to for comfort—people, possessions, or plans. But even the most stable mountain can crumble. Only God remains unshaken. Have you ever been in a place where you expected or trusted someone or something to save you from a crushing life moment, and they failed? The disappointment and heartache is evidence that our hope must be placed entirely in God, allowing Him to be our help

Isaiah 31:1 warns us not to place our trust in nations or horses or chariots or in the great strength of their horsemen, but to seek help from the Lord:

“Woe to those who go down to Egypt for help and rely on horses, who trust in chariots because they are many and in horsemen because they are very strong, but do not look to the Holy One of Israel or consult the Lord.”

Relying totally on God doesn’t mean pretending life is easy. It means acknowledging that without Him, we can do nothing and with Him, we lack nothing. It also means reminding ourselves that we are not entitled to help from any human being or institution; rather our eyes must be fixed on the Lord for help. God will come through for us, sometimes even through strangers, the atmosphere, animals, and in ways we could never imagine.