Wisdom Reflections Archives - Confessions of a Ghanaian Girl

Only the Owner Knows the Worth

A man works on a bag strap in a workshop, with tools and materials visible in the background. A medium-sized bag is showcased on a stool in the foreground.A man works on a bag strap in a workshop, with tools and materials visible in the background. A medium-sized bag is showcased on a stool in the foreground. — Like a master craftsman, we are all designed with purpose

I have had a very long-term struggle with my self-worth. For a very long time and until recently, I failed to realize that I was not the determining factor of my worth. My worth is not based on the things I accomplish, acquire or fail at. My worth was fixed way before I was even born. Way before my parents were born. So, it does not matter how I choose to see myself or how others put my value at, my real value or worth was decided and set in stone by God before I stepped on earth.

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them. Psalm 139:13-16 ESV

What made things change for me was finally coming into alignment with what God had defined as my worth and walk with this truth. A wise woman once shared this analogy, which also helped me reorient my thinking. She said, take the best quality and most expensive bag you know, like this AI-generated bag in the photo. When the owner designed the bag, she or he had a purpose for the bag. Perhaps it was to be a complement to a particular dress, or to be a bag that could carry some specific amount of weight. Now the owner would choose the resources for the bag based on this purpose. The owner would determine, for example, what kind of material or leather would best fit the goal he or she wanted to achieve with the bag. In the end, when the bag is created, it is only the owner who knows how much thought, how much toil and time, and the costs invested into creating the bag. It is the owner of the bag who can tell the real value of the bag, not the bag (the creation), nor the people who wish to buy it.

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. Ephesians 2:10 ESV

God made everyone one-of-a-kind, a masterpiece of art, that is irreplaceable. He knew what He wanted us to achieve and created us for this purpose. God’s plan was set in motion even before we were born, God does not make up things along the way. Nothing about us catches Him by surprise. So, if my Maker says His plan for me is for good and everything is working out for my good, who am I to argue with Him, only because I do not see my life in the way that God, the creator and owner, sees my life.

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28 ESV

I am still a work in progress, but it has been amazing for me to see how aligning my thoughts with God’s thoughts caused a major shift in how I value myself. I am pressing on and hope to come in complete alignment with His defined value for me, which is not hidden somewhere, but written in His Word.

The Parable of the Senior Brother

A digital artwork showing a village scene with mudbrick houses and figures celebrating. A mature figure embraces a younger one in the center, while another figure stands apart with crossed arms. Other figures are playing instruments and observing. Colorful cloths are draped around, and the scene is lit by a warm, setting sun.

AI-generated image depicting the Parable of the Prodigal Son in a Ghanaian setting

In the parable of the prodigal son, the senior brother was angry and refused to join the celebration of his brother’s return. What really made him angry was that his father celebrated the return of his brother, who had been careless with the father’s share of the property. In his opinion, such a celebration should have been reserved for him, the one who stayed, was obedient, and served.

In life, we often associate celebration with accomplishment, with achieved success, not with rebellion or disobedience. The celebration reported in the parable of the prodigal son comes as awkward for the senior brother, almost a disregard for his diligence. What the senior brother failed to see was that the celebration was an outpouring of grace. It had nothing to do with his younger brother’s past deeds. The celebration was that his junior brother had returned, and most importantly, with a new perspective on life. The junior brother had recognized his past ways as wrong and repented for them. That was something his father, in an act of pure grace, saw as worthy of celebration. Though his senior brother viewed his younger brother by his past sins, what he did not recognize was that his junior brother had made a shift from who he used to be. As his father said, “… It was fitting to celebrate and be glad, for this your brother was dead, and is alive…”. Basically, he had begun a new life, and that is worthy of celebration.

God’s arms are always wide open. God is full of grace and consistently looks forward to welcoming anyone who needs to return to Him to that place where we always felt at home. He is forever hopeful that one day, like the prodigal son, we will come to ourselves and run back home to him. When we do take that step to come home, our heavenly Father will throw a party and rejoice. We should keep in mind that those who remained faithful, our ‘senior brothers’, will see us in the light of the person we used to be and not be worth the fuss of a celebration. This is expected, especially as they held the fort while we were out and about in rebellion. What we need to do is pray for our ‘senior brothers’ so that they come into alignment with God and see that we were then dead and now only started living. And that indeed is a cause for God to rejoice.

The parable of the prodigal son can be found in Luke 15:11-31.

Choosing love over knowledge: edify, not puff up

Knowledge puffs up while love edifies is Paul’s opener to address the concern the Corinthians had about eating food sacrificed to idols. The words “knowledge puffs up” send me to the image of a puffed-up male turkey, glorious in its majestic spread-out tail feathers, brightly colored snood and wattle and moving majestically to impress hens or intimidate rivals. The turkey’s prancing, with its display of glory, offers no benefit to the flock; it is purely self-satisfying. Similarly, in humans, knowledge can bring personal glory, be self-satisfying and self-beneficial.

On the other hand, “Love edifies” means that through acts of love like kindness and sacrifice, the person who offers love is edified by doing those acts and edifies the receivers of those acts. Love is not parasitic; it should be mutually beneficial. For example, being kind helps the beneficiaries, but it also builds the character of the person being kind. In the end, as love or rather acts of love increases in the church, the church is built up to be a living embodiment of Jesus.

So, what was the issue that made Paul use “Knowledge puffs up while love edifies” as an opener? Apparently, some believers, particularly those considered more mature, visited idol temples to eat food sacrificed to idols. It was an issue because some other less mature believers thought believers should not eat food offered to idols. Paul did not give a simple yes or no answer. Instead, he urged the Corinthians to consider the impact of the mature believers’ actions on others. The mature believers knew that idols have no real existence and there is only one God. However, for the less mature believers, idols were real and eating their food pricked their conscience into sin. Therefore, Paul advises, if eating this food causes a brother to sin, choose love and abstain from that food. The spiritual well-being of everyone was more important.

The wisdom Paul imparted to the Corinthians transcends time, echoing in our modern relationships. Just as it was then, so it is now: it is indeed valuable to possess knowledge and much more valuable when it builds others and helps them grow. However, when we act on knowledge that others do not share, and our actions lead them into sin, we should abstain from those actions. And it is not only when knowledge leads others into sin that we need to consider our actions but also if our knowledge makes others feel less of themselves or excluded. For example, in online discussions, someone might use their knowledge of a topic to belittle others, rather than educate them. This creates division, not unity. Another example is when knowledge is used as a weapon for control or a symbol of importance. When this happens, the knowledgeable person refuses to share their knowledge because they are afraid it will diminish their importance or control over, for example their children, subordinates, or team members.

Choosing love means avoiding certain actions or places that could cause others to stumble. For example, in the home, choosing love may mean a partner choosing not to watch a favorite horror movie because they know it will influence the other. In the workplace, it will be a senior colleague choosing to patiently mentor a junior colleague by sharing their expertise and offering encouragement with no expected favors in return. This act of love not only helps the junior colleague grow, but also fosters a positive and supportive work environment. Consider how we react to people’s social media posts, even the posts that spread misinformation. Love would prompt us to privately and respectfully address the issue, edifying the community rather than creating public shame. Choosing love means using knowledge in a way that benefits and builds community including the church community, family, online community, and friends. It can also mean actively guiding others to the same level of knowledge through effective teaching and prayer. And letting love be the underlying element that binds everything together. In essence, love guides our knowledge, so that we uplift, not elevate, and build bridges, not walls.

Personally, I have found that when I share my knowledge with a heart of service, and not of pride, that the relationships around me grow stronger. It is a constant battle, but when I choose to love, I always see positive results. How does love shape your sharing of knowledge? Share your experiences below and let us learn from each other.

This piece is based on 1 Corinthians 8.

But knowledge puffs up while love edifies* (builds up) 1 Corinthians 8:1b NIV.

*Translation personalized.

A painting of a bridge spanning a river, made of books with different languages written on their spines. The bridge is illuminated by a warm, golden light, symbolizing knowledge and understanding. — True wisdom lies not in the accumulation of knowledge, but in the love with which we share it.