I have had a very long-term struggle with my self-worth. For a very long time and until recently, I failed to realize that I was not the determining factor of my worth. My worth is not based on the things I accomplish, acquire or fail at. My worth was fixed way before I was even born. Way before my parents were born. So, it does not matter how I choose to see myself or how others put my value at, my real value or worth was decided and set in stone by God before I stepped on earth.
For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them. Psalm 139:13-16 ESV
What made things change for me was finally coming into alignment with what God had defined as my worth and walk with this truth. A wise woman once shared this analogy, which also helped me reorient my thinking. She said, take the best quality and most expensive bag you know, like this AI-generated bag in the photo. When the owner designed the bag, she or he had a purpose for the bag. Perhaps it was to be a complement to a particular dress, or to be a bag that could carry some specific amount of weight. Now the owner would choose the resources for the bag based on this purpose. The owner would determine, for example, what kind of material or leather would best fit the goal he or she wanted to achieve with the bag. In the end, when the bag is created, it is only the owner who knows how much thought, how much toil and time, and the costs invested into creating the bag. It is the owner of the bag who can tell the real value of the bag, not the bag (the creation), nor the people who wish to buy it.
For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. Ephesians 2:10 ESV
God made everyone one-of-a-kind, a masterpiece of art, that is irreplaceable. He knew what He wanted us to achieve and created us for this purpose. God’s plan was set in motion even before we were born, God does not make up things along the way. Nothing about us catches Him by surprise. So, if my Maker says His plan for me is for good and everything is working out for my good, who am I to argue with Him, only because I do not see my life in the way that God, the creator and owner, sees my life.
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28 ESV
I am still a work in progress, but it has been amazing for me to see how aligning my thoughts with God’s thoughts caused a major shift in how I value myself. I am pressing on and hope to come in complete alignment with His defined value for me, which is not hidden somewhere, but written in His Word.
