Category: Allgemein

Going in with Zero Experience

God has a way of calling people with no experience to projects and missions of great generational impact and importance. While the world requires experience for jobs and tasks, God operates differently. He recruits inexperienced people to handle tasks for which they have no prior training.

Moses, Mary and Joseph, David, Jonah

Often, our response is no because we focus on ourselves, our circumstances, and our skills, when we should be focusing on Him. We allow fear to cripple us, and we count ourselves out, detailing our disqualifications.

One thing we forget is that when God calls us, He does so because of Himself and His plan; it’s not really about us. Also, He doesn’t do things half-heartedly, or have incomplete projects or purposeless things. Everything He starts, He completes successfully! Everything He does has generational implications for His plans for us.

Our calling requires us to place our focus on Him and be assured that He will equip us with the skills, wisdom, and knowledge we need to accomplish those tasks. It’s a matter of trusting the One who called us instead of trusting ourselves. We have to walk into those terrifying places and tasks with one assurance: that He who called us will accomplish the task through us as we place our total hope in Him.

The weight of the load

Two weeks ago, I came across a compelling book recommendation on Facebook. I then went to Goodreads to find out what the majority thought about the book. The most liked reviews were negative. They claimed the book did not deliver tips on living with less as was expected, but instead was a memoir the author used as an outlet to whine about her many life issues.

One comment struck me, though: the commenter said she was the same age as the author and had been handed much worse cards in life, yet had been able to manage it well without the privilege and money the author had. I thought it was a very simple and weird way to compare lives. It led me to think about how the same load can be much heavier depending on who carries it.

The weight of the load is determined by the person carrying it, not the passerby.

The same load might bring one to their knees while another juggles it with one hand. We are made and structured differently. It is unfair to judge another because they do not carry their life challenges in the perfect manner that we do.

A friend once told me about a situation where she got stranded at an airport and became sad and frustrated due to challenges she had getting to her final destination. I had been in a similar situation, so when I first heard the story, I wondered why it had such a toll on her. “Is she too soft?” God reminded me, using that conversation, that everyone is built differently; what I am insensitive to might disorient someone else.

Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses. When people are not being strong enough or holding themselves up enough in certain situations, it is because they cannot. Maybe it’s because they lack the skills, or because of the environment they find themselves in, or due to the way they were made by God. You cannot push people into strength or force them to hold up in situations just because we did so when it was our turn.

For example, with pregnancy, every woman’s experience is different, and even then, pregnancy differs again with each child. I think it is cruel to judge a pregnant woman by another pregnant woman’s experience. While pregnancy is a breeze for some, it is a struggle for others with life-threatening consequences.

If someone is unable to present themselves in the way that we expect, it does not always mean they are lazy or unwilling to push themselves. It can mean they are not effectively equipped to handle the situation, their bodies and minds are not up to the task, and they cannot, like a switch, step in and be strong and ready just because we think they should. That we each carry the same loads differently should settle finely in us, like dust in the desert.

Cheers to the many life skills mothers teach us freely!

Sunday is Mother’s Day, a remarkable day to ponder and be grateful for the wonderful sacrifices mothers make. 

This time, I have chosen to dwell on just one of the many skills my mother taught me years ago that is still relevant for my daily life: cooking ☺️.

I am grateful to my mother for deciding to teach me how to cook and for successfully passing this skill on to me.  

Growing up, I often took for granted the many things my mother taught me or tried to teach me. Perhaps I assumed it was simply a mother’s default mode to impart wisdom.

Adulting, parenthood and life, however, have taught me some profound lessons. It is one thing to wish the best for your child, another thing to set goals to do the best for them and a totally different thing to put in the consistent effort, sacrifices and finances required to support your child in becoming the best he or she can be. Furthermore, it is another challenge altogether to have a child who is receptive to being guided and molded by their parent in the way the parent believes is best. 

Cooking is a fundamental life skill. That is why I am so thankful that my mother shared the knowledge she gained from her mother and her education with me. I believe she passed it on with the best intentions, hopeful that someday I would be able to use it to take care of myself and my family. 

It would be a complete lie if I said I had been an easy student for my mother, always listening and obeying. Mind you, gentle parenting was not a thing during my childhood days. My mother is a Ghanaian mother, with zero tolerance for disrespect and ingratitude. Sometimes I thought my mother was only using me to make her life easier, like making me do kitchen chores and cook for the entire family. Later, however, I realized it was a simple art of nurturing taking place. 

Cooking is much more than just mixing ingredients together. It cultivates an abundance of skills: planning (meal planning, choosing ingredients, budgeting, shopping, etc.), creativity and experimentation, problem solving (like ingredient substitution and adapting recipes), self-sufficiency, patience, resilience — the list goes on.

My mother provided an environment where I learned to try, fail, and try again and again. The first time I cooked for my family, I attempted rice and beans, a total experiment and disaster! What I learned that day was simple: beans take a much longer time to cook than rice. It is best to soak and cook the beans separately first. Even after serving my family that memorable dish of hard beans and overly soft rice, I was still allowed back into the kitchen. There, I continued to learn, experiment, fail some more — burning dishes, setting napkins on fire, breaking plates, serving saltless food, and overcooking meals. Yet, through it all, she persisted with her patient guidance.

That is why, today, I choose to thank God for her and for teaching me how to cook. Though my mother never used a cookbook, her method was more heart and people centered, freely passing on to me many valuable skills, all packaged within the art of cooking.  As I reflect on the lessons my mother imparted, I realize that this gift of hers to me was far greater — a foundation of resilience, love, and independence that continues to help me every day.

This Mother’s Day, I celebrate not only the meals shared but the lifelong skills and values she lovingly passed on, shaping who I am and who I strive to be. For that, I am endlessly grateful.A Ghanaian mother patiently guides her young daughter, teaching her how to cook jollof rice in a bright kitchen.

Rich Meat Pie or Hollow Meat Pie: Allowing God to build our character.

There is an Akan saying that translates to: “Character is like pregnancy, it is impossible to hide it forever.” Figuratively, time and moments beyond control will inevitably expose our true character. If we hide our character due to expectations or our need for favor, with time and in moments beyond our control, the walls and boundaries we put in place will be broken down to reveal our core selves.

The Unavoidable Revelation of Character

I have been giving a lot of thought to the concept of character development since a sermon I heard recently. The preacher told the true-life story of a renowned person who was so gifted that his talents won souls, healed the sick, and were a marvel to the church and beyond. However, with time and in moments that fell out of his control, his character, which he had not allowed God to truly develop through his relationships and community, led him to lose everything, including his marriage and position. He became very proud, refused to listen to advice, believing he was the smartest and most gifted. This life story blew me away. God placed every good thing in this man’s hands, yet that inner self or Christian character, to be specific, let all that was valuable slip through his hands.

Examining Our Inner Self: When Character Limits Us

Since hearing this message, God has nudged my heart many times to consider the many ways my character limits me from becoming who God created me to be. Traits like pride, entitlement, ingratitude, and deceit (just to mention a few bad character traits) can absolutely ruin the good things God sends our way, like friendships, family, and community. I am learning just how valuable good character is and how building that sort of character protects us from losing the gifts and people God brings into our lives.

The Ghanaian Meat Pie Analogy: Substance Over Appearance

A Black hand holds two halves of a crescent-shaped Ghanaian meat pie, one showing a rich, full filling and the other completely hollow. Visual metaphor for comparing rich character and hollow character.Recently, I chanced on a Facebook reel of a lady making Ghanaian meat pies. A meat pie is a flaky savory turnover filled with spiced minced meat (usually beef) and vegetables, popular as a snack in Ghana. In the reel, the lady used thick dough but put little to almost no filling in the pies. Many comments expressed disappointment from picking up a pie with such a thick crust, expecting a generous filling, only to see an almost empty interior. Since I watched that reel, I found that very analogous to character. Because in the end, what counts is how well our inner selves have been enriched and equipped to handle times and moments that are beyond our control.

A hollow meat pie is an utter disappointment, especially when the crust looks so good on the outside. The truth is, it does not matter how much we cover ourselves in fake humility, educational degrees, prominence, gifts, or money. When those hard moments come knocking, what will make us endure and stand firm will be what we have built up on the inside.

Allowing God to Build Character: The Lifelong Process

From what I have learned in the past weeks, building good character is an ongoing process till we die. It cannot be marked as accomplished and simply moved on from. It is a process where God seeks to shine His character through us as much as we permit Him to do so. It is in our best interest to choose to be the rich meat pie, as the hawkers say – one filled with ample substance. When inevitably life slices us open, the character God has built within us will be revealed, a core that honors Him and blesses everyone around us. This is the essence of spiritual growth and true resilience.

Only the Owner Knows the Worth

A man works on a bag strap in a workshop, with tools and materials visible in the background. A medium-sized bag is showcased on a stool in the foreground.A man works on a bag strap in a workshop, with tools and materials visible in the background. A medium-sized bag is showcased on a stool in the foreground.
Like a master craftsman, we are all designed with purpose

I have had a very long-term struggle with my self-worth. For a very long time and until recently, I failed to realize that I was not the determining factor of my worth. My worth is not based on the things I accomplish, acquire or fail at. My worth was fixed way before I was even born. Way before my parents were born. So, it does not matter how I choose to see myself or how others put my value at, my real value or worth was decided and set in stone by God before I stepped on earth.

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.  I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them. Psalm 139:13-16 ESV

What made things change for me was finally coming into alignment with what God had defined as my worth and walk with this truth. A wise woman once shared this analogy, which also helped me reorient my thinking. She said, take the best quality and most expensive bag you know, like this AI-generated bag in the photo. When the owner designed the bag, she or he had a purpose for the bag. Perhaps it was to be a complement to a particular dress, or to be a bag that could carry some specific amount of weight. Now the owner would choose the resources for the bag based on this purpose. The owner would determine, for example, what kind of material or leather would best fit the goal he or she wanted to achieve with the bag. In the end, when the bag is created, it is only the owner who knows how much thought, how much toil and time, and the costs invested into creating the bag. It is the owner of the bag who can tell the real value of the bag, not the bag (the creation), nor the people who wish to buy it.

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. Ephesians 2:10 ESV

God made everyone one-of-a-kind, a masterpiece of art, that is irreplaceable. He knew what He wanted us to achieve and created us for this purpose. God’s plan was set in motion even before we were born, God does not make up things along the way. Nothing about us catches Him by surprise. So, if my Maker says His plan for me is for good and everything is working out for my good, who am I to argue with Him, only because I do not see my life in the way that God, the creator and owner, sees my life.

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28 ESV

I am still a work in progress, but it has been amazing for me to see how aligning my thoughts with God’s thoughts caused a major shift in how I value myself. I am pressing on and hope to come in complete alignment with His defined value for me, which is not hidden somewhere, but written in His Word.

The Parable of the Senior Brother

A digital artwork showing a village scene with mudbrick houses and figures celebrating. A mature figure embraces a younger one in the center, while another figure stands apart with crossed arms. Other figures are playing instruments and observing. Colorful cloths are draped around, and the scene is lit by a warm, setting sun.

AI-generated image depicting the Parable of the Prodigal Son in a Ghanaian setting

 

In the parable of the prodigal son, the senior brother was angry and refused to join the celebration of his brother’s return. What really made him angry was that his father celebrated the return of his brother, who had been careless with the father’s share of the property. In his opinion, such a celebration should have been reserved for him, the one who stayed, was obedient, and served.  

In life, we often associate celebration with accomplishment, with achieved success, not with rebellion or disobedience. The celebration reported in the parable of the prodigal son comes as awkward for the senior brother, almost a disregard for his diligence.  What the senior brother failed to see was that the celebration was an outpouring of grace. It had nothing to do with his younger brother’s past deeds. The celebration was that his junior brother had returned, and most importantly, with a new perspective on life. The junior brother had recognized his past ways as wrong and repented for them. That was something his father, in an act of pure grace, saw as worthy of celebration. Though his senior brother viewed his younger brother by his past sins, what he did not recognize was that his junior brother had made a shift from who he used to be. As his father said, “… It was fitting to celebrate and be glad, for this your brother was dead, and is alive…”. Basically, he had begun a new life, and that is worthy of celebration.

God’s arms are always wide open. God is full of grace and consistently looks forward to welcoming anyone who needs to return to Him to that place where we always felt at home. He is forever hopeful that one day, like the prodigal son, we will come to ourselves and run back home to him. When we do take that step to come home, our heavenly Father will throw a party and rejoice. We should keep in mind that those who remained faithful, our ‘senior brothers’, will see us in the light of the person we used to be and not be worth the fuss of a celebration. This is expected, especially as they held the fort while we were out and about in rebellion. What we need to do is pray for our ‘senior brothers’ so that they come into alignment with God and see that we were then dead and now only started living. And that indeed is a cause for God to rejoice.

 

The parable of the prodigal son can be found in Luke 15:11-31.

And forgive us, as we forgive ourselves

God is compassionate

Eager to forgive

Eager to forget

Of God’s forgiveness, we are sure

So, we ask.

 

And then there is us, flawed

Holding back in forgiving ourselves

Unwilling to let the past go

Unable to heal.

 

Too harsh with our thoughts, daily

Confident that if time could turn back

An error-free life would be ours

Forgetful our kind is born of errors

Empowered just for change

Today and tomorrow.

 

We should give ourselves forgiveness

The kind we seek from God

Allow ourselves redemption

Allow freedom

Allow forgetfulness.

 

It’s okay

I stumbled

I learned

I forgive myself

I let go

I forget

Sweet

She wanted sweet too – just like the others.

For though everyone called her strong she knew she was only playing the part they wanted. She was not strong. Not even a bit of what they expected of her. For there were some who deserved to have it sweet and some, like her, with no sweetness.

She had once tried that sweetness too, tempted by the stories she had heard. In the secret of darkness where no one could see her. But it kept ringing in her head even when she tried it, that her place was between the rocks.

For she felt wrong while she lay there, doing nothing and letting the drips of honey fall on her tongue.

Sweet tasted sweet and that was it.

Maybe if she had stayed and drowned her mind‘s taunts in the sea, maybe just maybe she would have become what all who dripped in honey became. Sweet.

And now she is something between sour and bitter – for her tongue no longer remembers what sweet tastes like.

Yet she yearns for it. She dreams of it.

That someday she will not have to pretend. Not pretend to be strong but be strong because she is. And be sweet because she is.

The Future is Female!

The first time I saw this statement was on a T-Shirt. The words bit me.  It sounds offensive, doesn’t it? What is this even meant to mean, I thought? I googled. I found varying opinions and reviews on this statement. So, what does this statement even mean?

Initially I assumed it meant simply the future belonged to females.  Where would the men be then? What would happen to our men, our fathers, sons and brothers? Would they go extinct?  What sort of a world would that be?

The first time “The future is female” statement was seen was in 1975 on a T-Shirt in the United States, during a period in the US noted as the second wave of feminism. It became more popular when Hillary Clinton used it as the title of her Book and when she run to be voted as the US President.

How is the future female?

I stand for women empowerment; but when I first saw that statement, I found it outrageous. Why so? I am female so if the future would be or belong to females it should make me happy shouldn’t it? As I later realised, the reason this statement made me uneasy was because the world often places one class as dominant (gender, race etc) over the other. So, what made it outrageous was the quick comparison to the male gender my mind made, thinking that empowering females meant a “de-powering” or “un-empowering” of males which is a totally wrong perspective to have as a feminist, I should confess.

Therefore, the assumption that once a woman is empowered somehow “un-powers” or displaces a man, is untrue. This might be the reason why in certain cultures or societies female empowerment is faced with strong opposition.

What if the statement was edited to be “if today is male, the future is female”? Does it make it more tolerable? If gender equality cannot be achieved today how about tomorrow? And if it will be achieved tomorrow, how will we get there?

Accepting the future as female.

I describe myself as one who believes that women are capable of making decisions about their bodies, should be enabled and empowered to be all they desire to be. I am one who believes that women should be allowed to be everything they want to be and even more.

But then there is society, there is religion and culture which often stands in the way of what a woman must be or permitted to do. And with time, as one with an interest in such issues, I have come to accept that what often impedes a woman’s empowerment is herself.

I think when women begin to limit themselves, hold back and avoid pursuing certain jobs or education because society decides who must take up what to whose benefit therein lies the greatest defeat to women empowerment. Using my life as an example, though I am currently in a field predominantly male, after high school I had a keen interest in Mechanics (mechanical engineering) and got an offer from the Kwame Nkrumah University of Science and Technology to study it. I however did not pursue it as I was informed of the low employment options for females in this area in Ghana.

Looking back, I question myself as to what other opportunities I have missed out on because it looked addressed to males or society felt it was not in my place to pursue them.

The biggest challenge to preparing for a future that is female in my opinion is believing in the voices of society, culture or family and starting to pursue less of oneself and believing that you are incapable. Therein lies the true threat to women empowerment. The fact that in another household a woman can be a medical practitioner and in another household another though equally capable, drops out of school because she accepts that a woman will no matter what end up in the kitchen is sad.

The future is female might seem impossible and perhaps only one for dreamers. But what if as outrageous as it sounds, the limitations to women to be Leaders, Entrepreneurs, mothers and function fully as professionals and receive Renumeration just as men can only be taken away if this statement is pursued today. If today belongs to the men tomorrow can be ours if we work on breaking down the varying barriers to women’s financial freedom, illiteracy and self believe.

Image Source: Edward Kimmel from Takoma Park, MD – Women’s March 0832

The tales of the traveller 

(Inspired by Thomas Frimpong & Eric Agyeman’s song – Menenam Mu)

The tales of the traveller should only be told by those who have walked those paths. For those who have never taken those paths assume it is an easy feat.

A fairytale of sorts.

The dares of the life of the traveller are many – and before one knows it, the traveller has been catapulted to a place where the return home is treacherous.

The traveller will see what must not be seen. The traveller will sleep where one must not sleep. The traveller will hear what must not be heard. However, many are the lures that keep the traveller fixated on the path where return is another new dream. For whatever negative the traveller encounters, he will comfort himself, mostly with the brightness of a future, which is the better day to come.

The curse of the gold that needs to be returned to its home pushes the traveller further into many unthinkable feats. Before he knows it, the traveller is convinced return can only be possible with the cursed gold.  

Though cursed, the gold must build a home – a home he may never live in but contented it sits empty, surrounded by grass. And that’s even a happy ending. With the gold, he must ensure no one is left behind. Even if he must sleep in hunger or on a bed that tires his bones. It must be done.

As the elders say, the bird that fails to fly will sleep in hunger. And thus, the traveller must keep gathering, even where food is farthest from their nest.